Big Balls, French Driving

The other day while driving with my husband, a bus driver whose bus was empty, stopped her bus in mid-street and put on her hazard lights while she went into the bakery to buy a fucking baguette. Traffic behind her couldn’t get around and traffic in front of her couldn’t get around. Note: It’s okay to park wherever and whenever you want as long as cars can get around you.

In this scenario, it wasn’t just the average “I don’t give a shit” car parked in the middle of the street. The bus was blocking the street from all angles possible. The cars behind us were pouring into the intersection blocking streets all the way down to who knows where. People were honking.

My husband, who happens to have big French balls, got out of the car and went into the bakery and started yelling at the bus driver. When he got back into the car, I asked, “Well, is she going to move her bus?”

“No!,” he said with wide hand gestures, his adrenaline pumping. “I asked her to at least move her bus two meters so people could go around her and she told me it was impossible! God! French! French and their attitudes! Fucking French! Sick of it!” (My husband is French.)

He got back in the car and we were just sitting there. My husband was so mad, but I was laughing. There was something beautiful about this scene. I can’t explain it, but the bus driver felt absolutely guilt-free. Amongst all these angry waiting people, all the horns that were honking, she did not care. She must have truly felt A-Okay with herself.

“God! I would love to be so goddamn unaware that I just didn’t give a shit about anyone,“ I said. “It must feel so liberating!”

Finally she got into her bus. She moved it forward two meters so people could maneuver around her (still not easy for drivers but at least she was offering them an option to get moving).

I don’t know if this is going to sound like a compliment, but the French have the biggest balls in the world. They have absolutely no self-awareness. Their dog shits in the street and you walk through it, not them. They do not care if they are inconveniencing someone. In fact, they don’t even know they are inconveniencing another person because they are that unaware! And if you tell them, they do not care! Maybe this is true happiness? To remain unchanged no matter who is yelling in your face.