Been Caught Stealing

Shauna Homestead and I began to hang out a lot more. My reputation was quickly being questioned by not only my friends but by my family as well. One day while alone in my room, I decided to cut my hair to be more risqué, to give me more of an edge. I cut the sides dangerously short. They looked shaved and for the first several minutes afterward, I just stared in the mirror, my heart beating so hard I thought I might pass out, “What the hell did you just do?” I had to stay calm. I cut my bangs into a neat point that covered my left eye and thickened the eyeliner around my eyes.

That evening at dinner, my mother asked, “Did you mean to cut it that short or was it an accident?”

My father said, “It looks like you just had brain surgery, kid.”

I went to school feeling like my real personality was finally being expressed. Shauna saw me and thought I looked great. My friends glanced nervously at one another as they saw me approaching.

I began showing my friends how good I was at shoplifting. Some of them were appalled. My sister would ask me to get stuff for her and I would. Soon, I had a very nice supply of eyeliners, lipsticks and nail polishes. I never stole anything major like clothing.

However, Shauna, it turns out, was a kleptomaniac. One afternoon when her mother picked us up from the mall, she demanded to look into Shauna’s bag. Through clenched teeth, she asked Shauna for tags and receipts to prove she hadn’t been stealing again. Shauna looked at me sheepishly and tried to get her mom to stop bothering her. I think this is the only time Shauna looked vulnerable. I felt sorry for her mom who looked both angry and scared. I couldn’t imagine getting to the point where my mother would ask this sort of thing.

One night while we were out with plans to see a movie. Shauna suggested we go to the grocery store first. She brought her own paper bags and propped them open in the grocery cart. “Let’s go shopping,” she smiled. I guess she decided it was time to kick bad ass school up a notch.

I walked alongside her, watching in awe as she freely strolled down the aisles, a teenager that stood out among the others. Why would two teenagers who were clearly too young to drive be shopping for groceries? I don’t know, but her plan didn’t seem to look out of place, even with the empty brown paper bags waiting stiffly. Her short blond hair had been blow-dried up thick and high. We both wore red and black checkered flannel shirts tied snuggly around our waists, the fashion for cool kids back then.

She began filling the paper bags with pink wine coolers. I had never drunk before so I was excited at the novelty and eager to be doing something bad. We strolled out of the grocery store with our bags filled. We stuck everything in our backpacks and walked over to the movie theatre that was next door.

We walked into the theatre and as soon as the lights dimmed, she broke out the wine coolers. She loudly popped them open and chucked the metal caps carelessly into the air. We heard them clinking as they hit the floor. One cap must have landed on someone who cried out, “Hey! Watch it.”

She laughed rudely and relentlessly, the laugh of a true rebel; her head thrown back and then propped her legs up on the seat in front of us. She began chugging her wine cooler and so did I. They tasted bubbly and sweet and gave me a nice warm buzzing feeling.

Every once in a while, she’d belch heartily and I could feel myself turn red with embarrassment but no one could see us.

“Hey, let’s go back to the store and get some candy,“ she said mid-film.

“What? How?,” I asked.

“We’ll just prop open the back door and sneak back in afterwards,” she said.

Feeling happy and always ready for an adventure, I followed her out. She wedged a rock under the back door so it was left open about an inch. Then we ran back to the grocery store. We began filling transparent plastic bags with bulk candy and gum balls. We strode out of the store giggling indiscreetly.

All of a sudden, we hear a man shout, “Hey! Get back here!”

“Book it,” she yelled.

I took off running into the parking lot and swiftly crouched underneath a huge truck. I felt like all of it must have been a dream. Why else would someone be chasing me? How else would I end up hiding under a truck? Peeking out from underneath, I could see Shauna had been caught. The man was holding her by the arm.

“Let’s go find your friend,” he said parading her around the parking lot.

I watched them not knowing what to do. I stayed for a while and then he led her back over to the movie theatre. I couldn’t just leave her like that. I crept out from my hiding spot and ran to the theatre and arrived on the scene calmly as if everything was perfectly normal. “What’s going on?” I asked playing daft.

“You and your friend know perfectly well! You’ve been stealing from my store.”

Not knowing what else to do, I broke out into tears and Shauna took the bait, “Please, please. You don’t understand. Her father beats her. If he finds out she was caught stealing, he’ll kill her. Please, let us go. We’re sorry.”

I put on a terrified face and just kept crying.

“Fine. You’re lucky this time. But don’t ever do this again!”

“We won’t, we won’t. We are so sorry,” she said.

Seconds after the man left, my father pulled in, as if on cue, to pick us up. I wiped away my tears and we got into his car.

“So, was the movie any good?”, he asked.

“Ah, it was alright,” I said trying to act like someone who just saw a movie and not like someone who was just chased and caught for stealing.

We drove silently for a while and then Shauna said, “Hey, remember that one part? That was funny.”